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Monday, September 05, 2005

Folksongs Are Your Friends

Over at Making Light, we can learn the invaluable wisdom provided by English folksongs. Here's a sample:

    Professions to be particularly wary of: clerks, salty sailors, serving maids, blacksmiths, highwaymen, gamblers, rank robbers, stonemasons, soldiers, tinkers, and millers. Anyone described as "jolly", "bold", or "saucy". Supernatural creatures are best avoided. If they can't be avoided, they should be addressed respectfully. If a supernatural creature sets you a task you're well and truly screwed.

    If you are a young lady and a soldier promises to "marry you in the morn", it means he's already married. And has kids. And he's not going to marry you anyway. Even if you're pregnant. Which you will be.

    If you're a young unmarried lady with child, and your pregnancy embarrasses or inconveniences someone else, consider yourself a sitting duck. Don't meet with your young gentleman alone, or at odd hours, or in isolated locations, even if he says he's taking you to be married. Next thing you know your Doleful Ghost will be telling your mother all about it. While he may say "Come all ye..." in the last stanza or two this will be small comfort. "

Go read more. It may save your life.

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